Glastonbury 2025: Who are Patchwork and the competition’s different secret units stars?

After the overall Glastonbury timetable was once printed this week, one band’s title was once on everyone’s lips. Except no-one is aware of who they in truth are.

Patchwork have a first-rate position at the competition’s line-up – 3rd from the highest of the invoice at the primary Pyramid Stage at the Saturday evening. The most effective factor is, there is no band referred to as Patchwork.

It’s a faux title for a thriller visitor – simply as an unknown band referred to as The ChurnUps had been at the Pyramid invoice in 2023, and became out to be the Foo Fighters.

Fans in an instant went into overdrive to take a look at to figure out Patchwork’s identification – a part of the frenzied guessing recreation surrounding the competition’s “surprise” units.

The primary theories come with:

• Pulp – The Britpop heroes, who stepped in to headline in 1995 (and did a secret set in 2011), have simply launched their first album for 24 years and feature a gaping hollow of their excursion agenda round Glastonbury. Plus, eagle-eared lovers spotted that keyboardist Candida Doyle talked in a BBC Radio 2 interview this week about her patchwork passion. Their spokesman has stated it is not them. But is {that a} bluff?? Likelihood ranking: 9/10 however on account of the legitimate denial, in truth 3/10
• Haim – The making a song US sisters even have a new album and feature a UK display in Margate at the Friday of Glastonbury weekend – so it could make sense. Plus lovers have came upon that Patchwork is the title of an difficult to understand 2011 German novel by way of writer Sylvia Haim (no relation) and an difficult to understand 2015 movie about 3 younger girls. Conclusive?! 7/10
• Mumford and Sons – The 2013 headliners also are at the comeback path, but when they are Patchwork some would possibly assume it somewhat underwhelming. 6/10

• Oasis – It could be somewhat overwhelming if the Gallagher brothers returned to Glastonbury to reunite every week ahead of their first legitimate gig. But they’ve categorically dominated it out. 0.5/10
• Robbie Williams – He has a brand new album referred to as Britpop with paintings the use of a photograph him at Glastonbury in 1995. 5/10
• Oasis and Robbie Williams – The title Patchwork may just recommend a supergroup, so how about the actual reunion we’ve got all been looking forward to, when they famously partied in combination in 95? 1/10 that Robbie performs and Liam rocks as much as shake a tambourine for one track.

In conclusion: I have no idea.

“Radiohead also are in the mix of rumours because they’ve been teasing some tour action,” suggests tune journalist and broadcaster Georgie Rogers, who was once a pass judgement on for Glastonbury’s rising ability festival this 12 months and is DJing on the competition.

“Or could Elton John be returning to do something with Brandi Carlile?”

Sir Elton headlined in 2023, and Carlile, his collaborator on his remaining album, is at the Pyramid Stage invoice at the identical day as Patchwork.

The Patchwork slot is only one of a number of tantalising gaps on this 12 months’s agenda.

Another thriller Pyramid performer is indexed as “TBA” for Friday afternoon, whilst the smaller Park and Woodsies levels – that have hosted secret units by way of large names previously – every have an empty area at the line-up.

“They’re quite prominent sets, and they do tend to put in massive artists,” says Rogers.

One workforce of lovers assume they know who will fill the ones gaps.

“Of the four main slots, I think we’ve got three of them, maybe four, nailed down,” says Ad, one of the most other folks at the back of the Secretglasto social media account.

“I think it’s definitely people who have got relationships with the festival who will be doing the big slots. An emotional return for one or two, I think. Some unfinished business.”

Ad does not say any further, however that would level to Lewis Capaldi, who struggled to complete his set in 2023 ahead of pronouncing a smash from traveling to get his “mental and physical health in order”. He made a tentative comeback remaining month, and could be a well-liked selection.

Lana Del Rey additionally has unfinished industry – her 2023 set was once reduce quick after she breached the curfew. She’s again on excursion in the United Kingdom, with unfastened days at the Friday and Sunday of Glastonbury weekend.

Other stars who’ve been rumoured come with Lady Gaga, who hasn’t performed Glastonbury since 2009.

Asked previous this 12 months what it could take for her to go back to the competition, she spoke back: “Not much”. Gaga has already performed Coachella and been on excursion this 12 months.

Lorde is not at the invoice both, however instructed BBC Radio 2’s Jo Whiley this week she’s “pretty keen” to be.

“The album’s gonna be coming out right around that time,” she stated. “I am quite tempted by what’s going on because I’ve got lots of friends playing as well. We’ll see if I can pull some strings and get there.”

The Secretglasto workforce have collected and posted details about wonder units for greater than a decade, and passion of their pointers has long gone “a bit crazy” lately.

Ad – who does not need to give his complete title – says they’ve constructed up a community of dependable resources. “We’ve got loads of contacts at different stages and record labels and whatever else. And people trust us to be sensible with the information,” he says.

“And the bands themselves don’t want empty secret sets do they? So we have had occasions where they have come to us.”

The six individuals who paintings at the account are not tune business insiders themselves. Another workforce member, JB, says they every so often method acts without delay to hunt affirmation.

“Now that we’ve been around for 10 years and have a decent bit of clout, we will contact some of the artists via their inboxes, and quite often they’re happy to confirm.

“Sometimes they do not. Sometimes they block us. But in most cases we are in a position to piece all that in combination slightly temporarily.”

He provides: “By the time the gates open, there are not many stuff we do not know.”

In the past couple of years, some acts have begun harnessing the buzz about secret sets for PR purposes for their album or tour, Ad believes.

“It used to only be pals of the competition, while now individuals are like, ‘If we do the name of the game set we are going to get lots of hype and media consideration’.”