Because “Beta, when are you settling down?” is a countrywide interest.
Aries
Declares conflict. Responds adore it’s a Fast & Furious trailer: complete throttle, 0 brakes. Might problem the uncle to a push-up contest simply to distract him.
Taurus
Smiles in a well mannered way whilst internally screaming. Goes house, lighting fixtures a scented candle, and stress-eats six samosas like a coping ritual.
Gemini
Talks in circles. Brings up Elon Musk, moon landings, and chai recipes—the rest however the subject. By the tip, the relative forgets the query and Gemini forgets the dialog.
Cancer
Cries ahead of the query’s even over. Then asks for a hug. Feels emotionally attacked however will nonetheless pack leftover laddoos for that very same aunty.
Leo
Answers with a full-blown monologue: lighting fixtures, access tune, and dramatic pauses integrated. “Marriage? Only when it matches the grandeur of a Sanjay Leela Bhansali film.”
Virgo
Prepares a spreadsheet of causes, timelines, and mental stats explaining why marriage now’s inefficient. Also palms out laminated flowcharts.
Libra
Tries to not offend. Says “soon” with a great smile whilst loss of life inside of. Changes the topic to any individual else’s marriage ceremony outfit.
Scorpio
Stares. Silent. Intense. The relative will both by no means ask once more or query their existence selections. There is not any in-between.
Sagittarius
Laughs and says, “First, need to hike the Himalayas and find inner peace.” Then if truth be told does it. Returns six months later with a tan and nil regrets.
Capricorn
Treats it like a role interview. Gives sensible updates, monetary targets, and a PowerPoint presentation. Might unintentionally get a wedding proposal from the relative’s neighbor’s cousin.
Aquarius
“Marriage is a social construct.” Delivers a TED Talk on individuality, then walks away mid-sentence to invent a solar-powered nostril ring.
Pisces
Imagines the easiest rom-com state of affairs, then fact hits. Mumbles one thing poetic and disappears into the kitchen to lend a hand with dishes—and existential dread.
Discover the whole thing about astrology on the Times of India, together with day-to-day horoscopes for Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius, and Pisces.